Fucking hell

When I’m done with this dentist appointment
I hope my friend picks up the phone
And I find out I overreacted
And don’t drive to his house
With no idea what to expect
And don’t run into his mom
And find out about some drama
Because I don’t know if I should be this involved—
If I should let you figure it out in your own—
Because I’m just a twenty year-old NEET
Who’s really full of himself
And I don’t want to find out later
That all my advice was bad
And that you followed it.
But then I also don’t want to find out
That all of it was good
And you didn’t follow it.
I don’t want to be uninvolved
But can I shoulder whatever blame
I know that I’ll allow myself to take?
How many times have I been called the devil on the shoulder
Self-proclaimed master of peer pressure?
Am I as powerful as I think I am?
If I am, how far will I abuse it?
I wish that you’ll answer your phone
And tell me that you figured it all out
More imaginatively than I know how
And with confidence
Because I only don’t want you to leave me
As much as I don’t want to drag you down to hell with me